Sunday, October 19, 2008, 2:43 AM
"Everyday im getting sick and tired of you. i will leave, dont worry."
Sunday, October 12, 2008, 10:36 PM
im useless
the msg she send me.
"im home. fyi i dont like you to call my friends abt my wherebouts.i hate it."
that's it??
oh my.
the whole day and thats it.
REASON:
i cant get you thats why i asked your 'FRIENDS'.
you dont want to ans my calls.
you dont want to reply my msges.
you never tell me where are you and all.
did it ever pass your mind that im fucking worried??
did it ever pass your mind that im waiting for you details??
the least you do is appreciate it or could say nicely.
your fucking ex boyfriend is with you.
he is also your 'FRIEND'.
whatelse can i say.
ive got no say when it comes to your 'FRIENDS'.
i know your're mad at me.
but for what reason?
that you could'nt wake up for work the other day??
c'mon lah d.
im worried for you and your work.
i dont want you to get fired or anything.
all work is tiring.
you have to endure and soon you will get use to it.
its not that i didnt understand how you feel (as what you would say).
i dont know how to tell you ready.
im in camp and you're having time with the 'FRIENDS' of yours.
what does that makes me feel?
its hard being in here on weekends.
its even harder that you're outside with 'FRIENDS'.
im at the end of my wits.
but im still sticking no matter what.
jusqu'à alors
, 9:35 PM
why people like to take advantage??
she's mine.
only mine yesterday, today, tomorrow and forever.
so get that sorry ass of yours down the road.
this is not the first time sia.
and each time this happen, its even bigger.
no matter how heavy it is, i will lift it with all i have.
god!!
ive just realise something.
on how someone would do for love.
my dear Darlaa if u reading this,
ive to tell you that i love ya alot aite, no matter what i will always do.
the ups and downs we had, had been really hard on us.
but im determine that i will have to settle this chapter and moving to next.
6 mths more aite. wait for me aite.
trust me as much as i trust you aite.
4 years together is no joke aite.
im not losing it all. i will not.
the past had been hard enough for me to realise all of it.
and you too have to do something to make it happen aite.
love ya.
p.s. tag if you've read it aite
jusqu'à alorsLabels: p.s. i love ya
, 4:41 PM
god i need help
life's full of surprises.
and i dont like it one bit.
it sucked.
im hating myself now.
this is so frustrating.
im in camp and she's out with her 'FRIENDS'.
do friends eat each other up??
or do friends help out, knowing the bad things happen yet they cover for them??
a friend in need, is a friend in deed.
i so fucking sad now.
tears flowing like water.
i love her ya.
alot.
but why is this shit happening to me?
what did i do to deserve this.
is it my past that made her like this?
ive long forgotten all of it.
ive changed.
and i feel great till this has had to happen.
i may lost her trust the last time.
never once in my life i didnt trust her.
since she turned 22, she had been this way.
i made her smiled on her special day.
but after that i receive all this shit.
what did i do to deserve all this?
ive sacrifice alot for her.
even leave my friends for her, just not to see her in pain.
can she do that for me?
i guess no.
am i 2nd to her friends?
than what am i to her.
i know where my all mistakes are.
i dont wish to repeat all of it.
ive had enough and regretted all of it.
and now she's doin it??
ive repent on all of my mistakes.
haiz.
it just sucked.
"Define for me - best friend, love & friendship."
"Sometimes, friendship replaces love and then, there is no space left for love"
what's that suppose to mean??
friends dont replace love.
this kinda friends you dont wish you had one.
i rather lose all of them then losing the one i love.
you dont fall in love everyday.
and you dont love someone the same as the rest.
its always different.
its coming to 4 years now and im not gonna let it go.
its not easy neither for you nor me.
but im still holding on cause of the thing we had.
its magical.
but yah, shit happens.
ive endured a long way and will still endure.
all im for is the truth and sincerity.
in both words and action.
im so down now.
im so helpless without her.
Dear god,
help me go thru this.
all this tests are from you.
and to you i pray for strength.
please protect her where ever she is.
im worried sick.
oh god, please help me go thru this.
only in you i seek for help and forgiveness.
my eyes are all red now.
my hearts all heavy.
my body feels weak.
my head is turning.
i need all the strength i cud get.
jusqu'à alors
Friday, October 10, 2008, 7:28 PM
What a week.
Very tiring sia.
Work and work and work.
Got half day off today.
And its like ive been waiting for it.
But im on duty this sunday lah seh.
Even boredem.
Miss my bro and md ayul sia.
Both go Bintan for in camp training.
Haiz.
I miss my Wifey.
sobs sobs.
Dunno when sia can meet her.
And brather Aji.
Ur not forgotten.
But i have one thing to tell you.
MOS DAH TUTOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Haahaahaa.
Anjckilipayey!!!
Im bored.
jusqu'à alorsLabels: to hate is to love
Wednesday, October 8, 2008, 1:30 PM
Wifey
Dear Wifey.
Happy 22nd bdae aite.
Hope to see ya later.
Actually, me and mama had planned where to bring you ready.
So yah, just be patient aite.
Love ya.
jusqu'à alorsLabels: to hate is to love
Tuesday, October 7, 2008, 11:21 PM
forgive me aite lil sis.
Dear God.
Ive made my sis upset.
Im Sorry.
I have too. its not that i want too.
Maybe its not cause of ur phone.
But its one of the factors ur not performing in school.
As much as i want you to excel in Silat, is as much on how i want u to excel in ur studies.
I had a bad time in school but i still went thru all of it.
I dun want you to get all the scoldings as what i receive.
One is enough.
I want you to learn the hard way.
And i hope, I HOPE you wud learn from it.
Forgive me if im harsh on you aite.
jusqu'à alorsLabels: to hate is to love
